No donks allowed

I haven’t blogged over here in a while, mainly because I feel very removed from any musical scene in the cold climes of Preston. Even though I have the internet at my fingertips, it’s hard to be inspired by anything right now. But I’ve come across some interesting stories across the all too barren wasteland that is the internet.

First of all, I read of a “rave” promoter from Houston, Texas who allegedly faked his own death. This blog post reports the death of a “Dustin” in July of this year, as does this thread on the local Houston Beats forum. Halfway down the page however, someone announces the man is still alive! Apparently he was seen walking down a busy street on a Thursday night – I think he could have done a better job if he’d waited a few more months. Anyway, one board member, Leanna, suggests he faked his own death because some thugs are after him, while D_Struct ponders the lack of information at the supposed time of death. Users of the TexasDNB forum are sceptical, but, according to Houston Beats, he is like a returning Messiah to the Teknosounds forum, another Texas-based site. I tried to investigate that much, but the forum in question was notoriously difficult to read.

On the whole, all I can say is that this is a bizarre situation, and will probably do nothing to help the reputation of “EDM” in the States. Either that or it’ll generate a lot of publicity for the rave scene, and get more people interested by virtue of the sheer ridiculousness of this story. I mean, who is this guy anyway?!

Moving on. I first heard the now infamous phrase “Put a donk on it!” some time in early Autumn, without fully understanding its significance, if I’m being honest. Then I noticed an article entitled “What the donk!” about the phenomenon of bad club music in Mixmag’s November issue. You know, Scooter, Cascada (who plays Killarney’s INEC in December), the series of Clubland albums… I thought nothing of it from atop my lofty seat above planet clubland – pah, what of this sub-par tripe! All of a sudden, I see this video pop up on nearly every forum I read! All over the past week. Without fail. Although I doubt they’re laying down slamming donks over on Teknosounds… Anyway. While this tune is emblematic of everything that I think is wrong with “clubland,” the internet is loving it! Hooray for irony! The Mighty Alboy over on Dilated Choonz calls it “moreish.” A huge shout-out has to go to Shock, who puts forward several tracks which could do with the aforementioned “donk.” Indeed.

Finally, I must end on a sad note. Following Saturday’s I Love Techno in Belgium, three Dutch girls have died in a car accident. Two sisters (aged 17 and 21) and their friend (also 17) were travelling home from the event when they crashed on the motorway The only news story I can find on the matter is in Dutch, but a quick online translation suggests that both driver and passengers fell asleep in the car. All that can be taken from this tragic incident is that it really pays to have some sleep after a heavy night like this. RIP etc.

So until next time, make mine Marvel and all that…